ast fall I was fortunate enough to spend a few months interning at To Write Love On Her Arms and I can tell you that there is much more to it than popular bands and stylish tees. If you don’t know what its aim is then I would suggest visiting www.twloha.com to learn about the seemingly never ending issues of addiction, self injury, suicide and depression. TWLOHA exists as a light, a net, a conversation telling people that they are not alone and that there are people out there who want to help or maybe even just listen.
We, along with founder Jamie Tworkowski, recently braved the cold night air of the small town of Monmouth, Oregon to discuss everything TWLOHA. The result is one of my all time favorite interviews. Thank you Jamie for your time and continuous support.
TWLOHA has been active for a few years now. When you started this organization did you have any idea you would have come this far?
Jamie Tworkowski: No, I mean we didn’t even mean to start a non-profit and I tell people that a lot like it just started as small as something can. We just wanted to help a friend and tell a story. Quickly, it started to be more than that, more than a story. We thought we could probably help more than our friend Renee so pretty quickly we started to step back and kind of dream a little bit. But then a lot of it was happening on its own just where so much of it was this surprising response from people. There was none of that kind of language on the site like telling anyone to send us questions or anything. Really, a lot of it happened on its own.
A lot of people don’t know this but TWLOHA is actually run out of small bungalow in a Central Florida. You have recently relocated to New York. Any plans of moving the entire organization?
JT: I think potentially someday. The thing with New York is that it’s just so expensive. It makes sense for me for right now for my role just ‘cause there are things that happen in New York compared to Cocoa, like you lived there, its this really sleepy Florida town. It’s where I grew up. Part of it is personal you know just trying to get away and be in a place where I feel inspired and alive. Then even for work it’s been great, just so many companies and media outlets and so many people that are based in New York. It’s been great to be around the corner from that. While in Florida it can get to be a bit lonely, not just personally but I think for the organization ‘cause it feels like there is not all these people that we should or would connect with or partner with so even the last few weeks its felt like it made sense for me to be in New York on our organization’s behalf. I know there are some folks on our team that would love that ‘cause Cocoa’s not the most exciting place.
You left Chris (AKA “The Amazing Intern) down there, right?
JT: Yeah. And we talked about him maybe potentially being the next to try it. I’m close with the guys at Charity Water, especially Scott Harrison and I think it makes all the sense in the world that they’re based in New York. I was at their office a few days ago and it was cool to see a non-profit based in New York City and it kind of makes it easy to imagine us being there. There’s a lot to like about it.
Why do you think that the issue of self injury is such a taboo subject?
JT: I think we have a hard time with things we don’t understand. I think a lot of people have a hard time getting their head around “why would someone hurt themselves?” I’ve heard it said “there are so many problems in the world, why would you add more?” People don’t understand the idea of it being an expression or a way to cope. For most of us the idea of using pain to deal with pain is really foreign so I think over time, a stigma and a stereotype gets built up. More than anything it’s just been something that people don’t talk about. It’s been a privilege over the last couple years, on some scale, to be invited to talk about it and potentially invite other people to talk about it. I think for us to believe its more like a symptom, that there is something deeper to it, there is something there and self injury is the outlet to cope with that. It’s been cool to let people know that they’re not crazy or not the only one who thinks like that or does that. It’s been cool for people to find a sense of community in realizing that. We just think so much of this is being human. We all deal with pain and addiction in different ways.
A big part of TWLOHA’s popularity has come from the artists that support the cause. I know that it began with your friend Jon Foreman of Switchfoot but did you ever think that music would become such a huge part of the cause?
JT: Obviously it was really foundational in terms of us getting off the ground. I think going back to the beginning with it getting off the ground with Jon being the first to wear one of the shirts and the five nights I spent with Renee going to shows a couple of those nights, I think myself and the team just kind of feel like music is something that is powerful and I know you guys can relate to that. We don’t look at it as filler or just entertainment, it can be something that really moves people and compliments this message. It reminds people that they’re alive and it’s okay to ask questions and to know that sometimes there are things to scream about. I think we really see a ton of value in it and seeing the influence in it and people being generous with that influence. I feel like so many bands have sort of carried us on their shoulders and introduced us to their fans and be a part of their story and its cool because now we have a little bit of a platform to introduce artists who we believe in but may not have a big name.
There are people who criticize this type of support saying you shouldn’t involve things that are trendy such as bands or styles of clothing because once that trend wears off in a person then they might drop the causes as well. How do you respond to that?
JT: I don’t think we’ve paid a ton of attention to it. For the most part the bands we’ve connected with are our friends or personally my friends. These are guys whose couches I sleep on when I’m in their town and guys who we really believe in the music that they make. I think we really try to focus on the heart of the matter and say we believe in music and we believe that t-shirts can be meaningful. Fashion doesn’t have to be the enemy of good. I don’t really consider our t-shirts fashion but they can be something significant. It doesn’t all have to be shallow or meaningless. I think you can get distracted down any of those roads but I think if its all for a greater goal of introducing hope and help and a message that we think is legitimate to people then I think its okay. I think if you give people a reason to keep coming back that’s greater than this band or that band or this shirt then hopefully people see that as well. And I think it’s been good as well that we haven’t married ourselves to one big artist or celebrity where everything is riding on that relationship. Some folks are probably more excited on some bands more than others but I would love it if our website could be a source of hope and encouragement for someone who digs hip hop or country music. It shouldn’t be us only making friends with people who go to Warped Tour or shop at Hot Topic. I don’t want it to be that way.
There are 33,000 suicides in America alone each year. Do the overwhelming numbers ever get you down? How do you keep your head up when it feels like TWLOHA is a drop in the bucket?
JT: I don’t know the exact quote but I remember something that Mother Theresa said because they asked her how she did it because she was faced so much poverty in Calcutta with people literally dying in the street and at their doorsteps. She basically said that you help the next person, you just put your attention there and maybe you don’t know how great the need is. People could have said to her that she was only helping in Calcutta, what about every other city in the world? I think she just felt called to these individual people, you know? It’s interesting because there are days and moments that feel small. Maybe it’s an email with one person and it’s very private and simple then there are opportunities where we’re on NBC Nightly News and it’s in front of nine million people. You never know how big of stage you’re going to be handed. I think we’ve been surprised and grateful at some of the opportunities we’ve had to try and introduce the message we believe in. What keeps us going and what keeps me going is those folks where maybe you meet them on the road or read a message and they say they’re still alive and encouraged. Maybe they got help for the first time or got help they hadn’t had in awhile. I think those remind you the heart of the matter.
Earlier this year you attended The Suicide Prevention and New Media Summit. The media seems to always be the first to blame when it comes to issues such as these. What are some ways that media can be beneficial to people who suffer from depression or thoughts of suicide?
JT: It was more about how can we use the internet to save lives. I was one of the youngest people in the room. There were researchers and doctors who had been in that field for decades so it was really humbling. I was kind of scared like it was the first day of school. There were a lot of these people who are considered experts in the field of suicide prevention and kind of wrestling with how we use MySpace, Facebook and Twitter. They kind of thought that I might be the young guy with the key to city and I think I surprised some people because I really didn’t talk about the technology or internet. I really said that the heart of the matter is just trying to move people and really the Twitter or Facebook or whatever platform is just a platform. The stage is one thing and you might walk into your favorite venue and it’s sort of interesting but how much cooler is it when your favorite band is playing. It matters what you put on that stage. I think I try to encourage people more than telling them to make a Twitter account. Lots of people have Twitter accounts that no one visits and aren’t compelling. To me, what keeps people coming back is that they find something significant there.
When one reads the original story, it is clear that you have a strong faith based background but some people find those undertones alienating. How do you ride that line?
JT: I think we try to know our audience so I might speak differently at a church than I would at a college maybe. There are going to be folks in the room with different backgrounds and I think as an organization and maybe even me as a speaker, we really try to communicate in a way that is comfortable for people. If we are going to get criticism I’d rather it come from the church. Maybe there is a guy who comes and doesn’t believe, I want that guy to leave comfortable and be encouraged. I just don’t believe in the pressure that everything has to end with a come to Jesus moment or it doesn’t count. I think that’s the reputation of the church a lot of the time. We don’t even know how to have a conversation without the come to Jesus moment sometimes. It’s kind of a slap in the face to some people that we don’t even earn the right to speak into people’s lives. Sometimes the language is used that the church known for being excited about their answers, like we tell people how to vote and live and think but we’re not really known for being good at meeting people in the questions. So whether it’s a blog or the website or speaking we try to create an environment where people can bring their questions whether it’s about faith or getting help or whatever it may be just that they feel valued as a person.
I know a lot of people will say “How can you even present the idea of hope without mentioning Jesus”.
JT: I’ve heard it said that all truth is God’s truth so whether you label it that or not I think people’s lives and stories matter to God so if you’re doing a work that engages that idea then I think God is interested. Bono says stuff like “God is in the room” when we talk about stuff like this. So it’s not like you have to play certain music or use certain words for it to count. I think we’re all called to be different expressions of the body of Christ or however you want to say it. I think we’re not pretending to be a church or a youth group. I think we’re called to be something unique and we’re just trying to do it well. The cool thing is that some of my heroes from the church have been really complimentary so it’s not like we’re just going alone with our noses in the air. It’s been neat to be encouraged and validated by guys we respect and look up to. And you see that in the Bible as well.
What is Renee up to these days?
JT: She’s working on her second book. Purpose for the Pain was what she published herself as her first book which was a collection of journals. She is working on what will be her first memoir so I know that is taking up a lot of her time.
In these tough times, have you seen much of a decline in donations?
JT: We’re kind of unique in that most of our donations come in the form of t-shirt sales so we’re surprising in that way. It’s kind of a freak thing in that about 90% of our support comes from those sales, that doesn’t really happen in the non-profit realm. Retail has been a really cool surprise too having our shirts in Hot Topic, Zumiez, Ron Jon’s and West 49, which is a chain in Canada that is going to start carrying them. As much as it’s a really tough economy it’s been really cool that some other doors have opened.
What will the next year look like for TWLOHA?
JT: We’re partnering with 1-800-SUICIDE to create an element of live help. IM ALIVE is the title for it. So we are committed to that. Post Secret is a partner in that as well. Live help is something that we’re really excited about, just for people to meet with other people who are qualified to help them in a moment of crisis. We are trying to get 1000 people to go through the training to become qualified before we launch. There are a lot of opportunities at colleges like speaking events and concerts. For the fall we launched fifteen university chapters and we plan on more. So for me, that’s a perfect fit though I’m a few years removed. It feels really open minded and you can talk about anything.
I’m curious about you getting older and just how you feel about maybe starting to feel more and more removed from the scene that TWLOHA is so big in.
JT: The cool thing is that I feel so comfortable just being myself. I don’t have to pretend to love every band on Warped Tour. I think that’s part of why New York feels so good is that there is this whole big world out there beyond Warped Tour. Like with The Woodie Awards, it’s an honor just to be invited into that with those artists. It’s a circle that is new for us because it is outside that other realm. I’ve been proud of what we and I have been able to accomplish at 29. I’m totally psyched on how things have gone. If my whole life and my whole identity was wrapped up in what people think I could lose my head but I don’t have to pretend I love every band that every other staff member likes.
Explain a bit about The Woodie Award.
JT: I came across something on Twitter a few weeks ago and a girl had mentioned that she had voted for me and I figured it was the kind of thing where you could vote for anyone in the world and she was being super kind. So I followed this link then it was this page that was an extension of MTV.com. Its The Good Woodie award which is for artists and in the realm of social justice so basically the artist’s dedication to a cause has made the biggest impact. Its Alicia Keys, John Legend, Wyclef, an artist named Kenna and Ra Ra Riot. I actually found it before our publicist did and she was really embarrassed. I think it really speaks to our story and audience, for all these folks around the world who have gotten excited about this. I was at MTV in Time Square a few days ago filming something for the nomination video. The whole thing is like waiting for someone to pinch me. I think I have to remember that I’m walking through all of this on behalf of the people that we represent and even beyond our audience to the families who have lost people to suicide or addictions. I’ve been trying to take it out of the realm of some individual award and just trying to use language that invites people into it.
